i miss

the old times (: after looking at a couple of pictures, i realized how much fun it used to be in the past, where we didn't really care about the consequences & just did what we wanted to do. & now, i'm just like, stuck at home doing nothing all weekend -_- rawr, i'm bored.

so let's see. lately my parents have been on my nerves, and annoying me to the point where i wish i wasn't even here at the moment cos i would have blown up already if i weren't sick. but the thing is that, i'm fine with my dad during the day but when the night comes, he just pisses me off. and for my mom, jeez, she can make me mad all day. idk what's up with them. maybe they just love making me mad or something. it makes me wonder how they would react in this lifetime if i were to die the next day. it's all cos of that stupid swine flu thing going around & watching oprah, how that little girl died from it & something about a backache & whatnot. it makes me wonder what would happen if i were to die soon. COS I'M STILL SICK. fck -_-

ANYWAY, school is almost over. we have 2 more months to suffer & a month of testing to survive. so many things are coming up & i'm hella excited :D but there are hardships in these events -_- idk how we're gonna make it right but we'll try. let's see what's the schedule for this month:

MAY 2009
8 - Jamie Nadine's Birthday!
9 - PARTYYYYYYY (this is where the hardship begins. we don't know how to get to her house & how to get home LOL.)
10 - happy mother's day! (:
14 - Yuca & Fallback Day! [switch back to term AB classes to review for CST]
18-20 - CST Testing Begins! ;O
25 - Memorial Day! [is there school? o.O]
28 - Yuca [4:30-6pm]

WOW, what a month. it'll pass by quick, just watch! ahaha. & i think the keeds are gonna start practicing for the asian pageant. see how busy it's gonna be? studying for testing & then practicing, jeez. but i can't wait! & this time i'll definitely go watch the show cos i can leave my 3rd period to watch it (: haha. whoo, these next 2 months will be a blast, haha. &i can't wait to see what else link crew & interact club has for events to be planned. it's always fun (: well not always, but it gives me something to do, haha.

okay so like, i got 2 of my tests back last week & i BOMBED IT. -_- didn't do so well. so hopefully the one that i took yesterday, i hope i did better on it. cos it was only 2 essay questions & it wasn't that hard cos i had the right answers, UNLESS if i didn't add enough details, then i would have a lot of points taken off, rawr -_- yeah so like, everyone keeps making me think about my future. everyone has theirs set, except for me. &whenever i say i'm not going to a university, everyone seems so surprised, like they were expecting that i would go to a university o___o i'm scared now. &that time when i told my aunte i wanted to do culinary arts, she gave me a weird expression. UGH I'M SO CONFUSED & FRUSTRATED WITH MY LIFE. idk what to do. i mean, i know it's my choice but it's hard to decide for myself sometimes. my head is always so indecisive and i never know 100% if i wanna do something or not. i remember how i wanted to be an actor, but i get nervous or shy in front of a huge audience, so that was out. then i wanted to be a nurse too, but i'm somewhat scared of taking blood for someone, cos i'll get nervous if i don't do it right & i wanted to be a therapist but i have so many of my own problems to deal with that i can't even take care of by myself & i wanna do culinary arts cos i like to cook and wanna learn more, but the thing is that, I HAVE NO SUPPORT. idk what to do -_- and i'm good at massaging but when i told my parents i wanted to get that job, they were like "it'll mess up your hands, SO NO." wtf do they want me to do T.T my head is thinking of all this nonsense right now. i can't even tell from the right & wrongs anymore. i'm going crazy -_-

blah, i'ma go calm myself down now ..
btw; i feel sore for some reason .. this is weird o.o
okay okay , byeee.