fiiiiiirst (:

time to blog! trying something new; got kinda tired of xanga x] haha. let's see how this turns out. (:

so today, i couldn't go to the children's day festival "/ i wanted to volunteer for it, but i had no ride to get there. so sad! so i had to wake up early today to do laundry. wow, what a morning! waking up at 7:45am? left at like 9. i thought i was gonna be hecka tired, but really i wasn't. i slept early the other night, like at 9:50pm. i had a lot of sleep, haha. so my sister and i had an interesting conversation. well, we always do when we go do laundry. it's the only time we actually talk about personal matters cos it's hard to do that at home when there's stuff going on & yeeah, anyway! i had nothing to do today -_- i watched this really weird movie called "spider lillies" with rainie yang in it. i didn't really like it "/ what a waste of my time, haha. so that was pretty much my day! everyone's home now (: earlier than usual too o.o family day tomorrow! out for lunch, then shopping at costco!

yesterday was the worst friday EVER. i think the only person that knows about the situation is jelly >< it got a little more dramatic than i thought it would. i couldn't control my emotions -_- i cried for about 5-7 hours. well it was an on and off thing though. the more i thought about it, the more i cried. i hardly ate ANYTHING. i didn't even bother drinking anything either. &the worst thing was that when i got home, it was acted like nothing ever happened. so messed up, i got hella pissed off -___- but yeah, it's not like i can change that anyway. "/ i'm still feeling hella depressed though. i just need a seriously tighhhhht hug & someone to vent to T.T

even though i'm feeling a little better today .. but yeah. that's all ! oh & i fell in love with chinese songs these past few days. you know how there's just some songs where you don't understand a word cs it's a different language & no matter how many times you play the song, you still won't know what it's saying? well this is one of those moments & that's just what makes it meaningful to me. i don't know how to explain it, but it's just great <3 & i just wanna say .. i miss everyone "/ mainly those who i haven't hungout with for the LONGEST times, or just because you mean a hella lot to me. no words can really explain how i feel right now.

MIXED FEELINGS.